Holidays and Addiction = UGLY.
We have had our fair share over the last 6 years. The day; whether it was Easter, Thanksgiving or Christmas or any other Holiday on the calendar I could be assure that some sort of chaos would ensue.
It never seemed to fail that before dinner was even finished my addict would be insisting that someone had to take him somewhere… friends, down the street, the next town. Anywhere but where he was. I now know that it was because he HAD to score his next hit, without it he would be dope sick and that to him was uglier to face then bringing complete chaos to the dinner table.
I wasn’t sure what to expect as we prepared for Thanksgiving. My son, now clean nearly 6 months was getting excited over a family holiday. I chose not to get my hopes up that this time would be different. As we sat around the table for dinner the week before Thanksgiving, my daughter asked what she could bring… normal… but what happened next wasn’t.
My son asked “what can I bring?”
Tears started to fill my eyes as I looked at my addict man/child with a moment of pride. I told him he could brings rolls
He seemed very pleased.
As Thanksgiving eve rolled around off to the grocery store I went. As I gathered up the things my husband told me to get (yes he does the cooking). I also grabbed rolls. My son, though he had been paid, had not picked them up or planned as he said he would (or so I thought).
When I got home and started unloading my collection of Holiday necessities, my son comes in from out back and says “good your home… can you take me to the store so I can get the rolls”… yaa about that.
He was very disappointed that I didn’t believe in him…. Oh I have so much work to do in my own Recovery walk…
The next morning we discovered we forgot a few things. I was so BLESSED to hear my son say… take me to the store I will get them for you…
I have to add that this was the first Holiday that my son stayed ALL day. No request to leave. It was such a joy to sit at the table with him, have family conversation (ok it was looking through all the Black Friday adds talking about Christmas)… but most of all it was a real time of thanksgiving. Thankful that for today I have my son back. Clean, clearer minded then he has been in a long time, that we experienced family like we hadn’t in a long time. Now that is Thanksgiving.