For months I have prayed the words. “Lord whatever it takes to turn my son’s life around”. My personal version of the well-known verse from the Lord’s Prayer ‘Thy will be done”. I have battled with my momma’s heart hoping, wanting to be part of the healing process, and vowing to stand alongside him to help show him the way.
All of which failed miserably.
God has clearly shown me I WON’T be the one or even one of the one’s who will help him. I was perfectly ok with that abstractly. It is my desire to see him living a sober life, moving forward, taking another good step each day, submitting his heart and life to God. I say those things to myself, to him, and others all the time.
I will have to admit this morning when I saw his post on social media thanking another person, another “mother figure” in his life for guiding him, standing with him… all the things I vowed I would do as long as he stayed clean… it STUNG. (Confession is good for the soul… and I am confessing).
And moments later I heard that still small voice in my heart say… “Whatever it takes… I AM using the WHATEVER… so Stand aside and let me.”
This makes me think of the story in the Bible of the judgement of King Solomon. We love our kids enough to let them go if that will give them life. Bless your heart mama.
Hold your head up high
Pray a lot
Things will get better
Sending more prayers
Thank you for your heart felt compassion. I am holding on to HOPE that no matter how or from whom my son will make it through this horrific thing we call addiction onto a new life!
I know this is a month later than your post, and I am not sure I really have the words to say in response, but,,,I have also prayed the “whatever it takes” prayer, almost daily sometimes. While I am not sitting in your shoes (watching while another person and or momma gets to help your son), I can feel your pain in your post. Sometimes, other well meaning believers who do not know that pain, will tell us to have Gods perspective for the situation, which is something we do desperately need. But, sometimes, getting up and putting two feet on the floor, let alone, sitting at the Lord’s feet are almost all I can do some days. My son also struggles with addiction, currently, he is sober serving a 2.5 year prison sentence for drug related felony. Part of me is relieved that I know he is not on the street , or who knows where. Of course, the other part is horrified…. but I have been praying the release prayer (my version of whatever it takes, or Your will be done Lord) for many years, and while the pain is always there, He keeps me (and you) from losing our hope. God bless you, and me while we are waiting on the Lord. He will renew our strength.
I am so glad you responded (a month later), because I needed to re-read this post today. I needed to have it refreshed in my spirit. As I was praying for my boy this morning I was lamenting ALOT… and first thing I open my email and there is your post/response. God is good! I will keep reminding myself that Whatever it takes, His will will always be the BEST way.
Praying for you and your boy as well.
Because of Hope!
Way to go mom! You are an awesome mom!
After 5 years of heroin abuse, my son made it six months clean and today I was forced to kick him out. Your blog has been my strength. My heart is broken but I know from everything I’ve read here it is his path now. Than you for all of your sharing and encouraging words
It so hard when they have made it for a good stretch and they fall back into it. It breaks our hearts to watch them go back down that destructive path. Keep hanging on to the HOPE of a new day with new and better choices.
Because of Hope!